Chapter 7 (Nightmare)

Still reeling from the revelations in the last chapter I am continuing on.

Tired after the beach Bella goes right to her room upon arriving home. She digs out her portable CD player and drifts to sleep.

In her subconscious dreams she is in the forest with Jacob, Mike and Edward, all on different sides of the forest and all offering differing advice. She screams and awakens from the night terror. It is way too early to get up, however she cannot go back to sleep. Instead, she showers and decides to do research on vampires. She finds a site that might have the information she seeks so she starts reading. She comes across 3 entries which catch her eye. The third has the strongest pull for her.

p134-135"About this last there was only one brief sentence. Stregoni Benefici: An Italian vampire, said to be on the side of goodness, and a mortal enemy of all evil vampires. It was a relief, that one small entry, the one myth among hundreds that claimed the existence of good vampires"

She is trying to reconcile what little she knows from movies and all the various entries flashing on her computer and decides that not many written myths follow what she has observed regarding the Cullen family.

She snaps off her computer and decides she needs to get away from the house. She ignores the truck and decides to take a walk. Heading towards the woods, she reflects on what Jacob has told her. If there is truth to his fable what is she going to do about it? She rules a resounding 'impossible' at first, then analyzes the Cullens mannerisms along with statements made by Edward. She realizes she is in way over her head but that cannot be changed due to the magnetic pull he exerts over her. With her decision made she goes back to focusing on her ordinary daily life.

Another (rare) sunny school day and like clockwork Mike was all over Bella like a puppy. He asks her out (again) but this time she has reached the end of her patience and tells him that Jessica likes him and he should ask her out. The girls ask Bella if she will go with them to Port Angeles to dress shop for the dance. Bella is saddened by the absence of the Cullens this day.

The chapter closes on the beginning of the shopping excursion (Chapter 8 next)

What have I learned from this chapter? Never listen to heavy music before going to sleep, never research whats troubling you immediately after you wake up from a nightmare and trust your instincts.

Although I waver on the actual existence of vampires mostly due to my religious upbringing, I have seen enough movies, read enough books and even watched one or two of those weird documentaries stating that vampires are real to know that people will believe what they see with their own eyes rather than what they feel or what other people speculate on. I know how it is to be a believer in some things and a non believer in others and I empathize with Bella on this point as she attempts to mesh the fantasy with the reality.

At 17, it is hard to know your own mind but you have to make decisions and stick with them as Bella has done so forcefully in this chapter. I only wish now that I had her mindset at that age when I was all over the page on what I was going to do with the rest of my life. C'est la vie...Such is life. Fast forward to Chapter 8.