Chapter 13 (Confessions)

Wait for it...vampires sparkle in the sun. Bella compares it to p260 'thousands of tiny diamonds.' He queries if she is afraid after this and she replies p261"No more than usual." He smiles, caresses her hand and wants to know what she is thinking. She wants to be able to read his mind and cannot believe he is really real and is afraid. He replies p262 "I don't want you to be afraid." She explains that she is not afraid of him, rather the unknowns of the relationship.

She leans in to him and in a split second he's gone. Apparently Bella went a little too far with that move and he went to calm down. With great effort he returns to Bella swearing he will not hurt her and can control his urges. They resume their talk and both start to reveal how much they care for each other. (B) p266 "And I'm afraid I'd like to stay with you, much more than I should." (E) p266 "I'm essentially a selfish creature. I crave your company too much to do what I should." He then gives an analogy that every human smells different and compares her to the strongest drug and he is an addict for her.

She wants to know how he could hate her so much before they got to know each other. He emotionalizes p270 "The fragrance coming off your skin...I thought it would make me deranged that first day." He tells her he ran to Carlisle to leave Forks (explaining his absence that first week) and realized he was weak for running away rather than facing his problem head on. He came back determined to treat her like everyone else. He wanted her to forget that first day and be friends, although every time he saw her the same jolt as the first day haunted him. He feels it would have been better if he had exposed the secrets then, rather than now. She wonders why.

p273 "Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me. The thought of you, still, white, cold...to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses...it would be unendurable." "You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."

At these words Bella's head is reeling and she tells him that she would p274"rather die than stay away from him." and they laugh at the wonderful moment.

p274 (E)"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb"
(B) "What a stupid Lamb"
(E) What a sick masochistic lion"

They actually get very close and hold hands and caress each others faces and he explains how alien these feelings are to him and he is not used to these 'human instincts' They stay this way for a while and then as they are ready to leave he decides to show Bella how he travels within the confines of the forest. He asks her to climb on his back and then he takes off at a run and the entire forest becomes a complete blur to Bella. When they reach her truck he sets her down and she is a little overwhelmed. He then says he wants to try something. He hesitates, breathes to see if he is still in control and then presses his lips to Bellas. She responded in a true fashion by entangling her fingers in his hair and holding him tight to her. He gently disentangles himself and realizes he is stronger than he could have imagined. He claims p284"she is intoxicated by his very presence" and gets in the truck to drive her home.

Be still my beating heart. How romantic is this? He used the almighty 'L' word and then ever so gently cared for her. He kissed her softly, he expressed his feelings verbally and controlled his deeper evil desires.

For those of you who are reading this and know very little about this saga, this is the chapter that started it all. The authoress, Stephenie Meyer had a dream and when she awoke she was desperate to put it on paper. Thus, Edward and Bella were 'born'.

I admire the talent of bringing your sleep dreams into the real world of writing or any other form of expressionism. I do not remember any of my own dreams except for the night terrors I suffer from occasionally. I have probably had some good dreams if only I could remember, what would that be like?

I am a very open, yet emotional person once you get to know me. Everything I think and feel is laid out for the world to see. I have a structured belief system, mostly that I do not have to see something or hear something to know it exists. This chapter emotes everything that Bella and Edward are feeling about their 'new' relationship. He is still extremely wary of hurting her in the slightest fashion and feels she is a fragile flower meant to be protected. She is feeling a frenetic obsession for him because he is just too perfect and she is afraid that she is living in a dream and he is not real. Yet, with all of that said, the emotion is too real to be ignored and too fantastic to be forgotten.

I pause here for a few minutes and reflect. (Silence. Pause). Okay, on to Chapter 14.